W-O-R-D-S

What do the words you speak say about you? You see, you think you’re talking about other people. You think you’re giving your opinion on matters outside yourself. But what you don’t realize is that every word that comes out of your mouth says more about you than anything outside of you. Your words, chosen to give the appearance of your own great wisdom, provides a candid window into your own soul, making those around you all the more wiser to who you actually are.

Words that hurt. Are you mean?

Words that break down. Are you insecure in yourself?

Words that gossip. Are you two-faced?

Words that cause conflict. Are you a snake?

Words that lie. Are you hiding something?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Your words breathe these answers to every question even though you would outrightly deny them. Your words speak louder than you think.

Look into yourself. Who are you?

If you don’t know, then listen to yourself speak. It can be a life-changing, and sometimes inside-changing, experience.

Words should be Kind.

Heavy-laden with Love.

Filled with Compassion.

Inquisitive for the truth.

Laced with Understanding. Or at least the desire to understand.

And if understanding, kindness, love, compassion and truth cannot be found, then the advice my mother once gave me might be wise: If you haven’t got anything constructive to say, don’t say anything at all. 

"Be sure to taste your words first, before you spit them out." 

What was I saying?

I haven't written much over the past several months.. Not for lack of interest or even lack of topics up for discussion. So my excuse? 

Porridge brain. 

I used to wonder just how real porridge brain was. Other women would warn me, saying, "One day when you're pregnant, be careful when you do this, concentrate more when you drive, try to avoid doing that... because you become stupid and slow - it's called porridge brain." I used to wonder if "porridge brain" was just an excuse that women used for freezing the car keys, or setting the kitchen on fire by leaving their handbag on the stove. 

I did a little reading up and it would seem that porridge brain is indeed a real condition related to pregnancy and early parenthood. It really is a result of a woman's brain being soaked in progesterone and estrogen, and aggravated by the gradual decrease in good sleep. According to an interesting article on WebMD, porridge brain even serves a purpose in preparing one for motherhood. (How?, I ask you with hormonal tears in my eyes...)

Well, at five and a half months, I can confirm that porridge brain is not a myth. I have forgotten whole conversations that I've had. I find myself staring absent-mindedly at my computer at work, having completely forgotten what I was busy with. There are times that I have been thinking about something, and then the next moment gone completely blank. I've never been much of a chatterbox, but one of the weirdest things that I have found is that I struggle to hold a conversation in the first place. Socially awkward doesn't begin to describe it. I just have nothing to say, nothing to add to the conversation. So sometimes I find myself smiling stupidly at someone and thinking, "What on earth do I say in response to that...?  Umm... Wait... what were we talking about?..." 

Louann Brizendine, MD, director of the Women's Mood and Hormone Clinic at the University of California, San Francisco, says "Pregnancy brain is the feeling of walking into a room, going after something, and not remembering what you went for - about five to 10 times a day."

That just about sums it up. And that's why I haven't written much. 

Thankfully I haven't done anything enormously stupid yet... or maybe I have, and I've just forgotten about it... but I wonder what some women have done in this state. There must be some real stories out there :) 

What was I saying?...

*wonders off to make tea*